Checking In - Put People FIRST!

It's been awhile since I've posted.  You'll find I'm pretty busy this fall and it's likely I won't be posted regular until I finish my schooling in December.  I plan to take a month off then I'll open my office doors with full services of licensed therapy and certified health coaching.

Tomorrow I fly out to Nova Scotia where I've been asked to speak at the 2018 Health Summit on Health Coaching. I had to cram my already busy life into an even shorter work week.  In the midst of this I had a call from a reader.  Now, I'm not big on the phone at the best of times and I avoid it like the plague at others.  This reader had called before a couple times and wanted my free newsletter, which is mentioned on a TV show I did many years ago.  As In no longer do mail outs of my newsletter but rather use only the e-version (sign up at the top right of this page), I found myself reluctant to call back.  I did try a couple times and when it didn't go through crossed it off my list of To Do's.

Well, they called again yesterday and this time when I called back I got through and it was a blessing to both of us.  We talked about nutrition, extremes, stress, and enjoying our food while trying to eat as healthy as probably, not necessarily possible.  I would have missed out on this blessing had I listened to my feelings.  I didn't feel like it.  I was so busy getting an assignment finished, packing for the tripo, finishing handouts for the seminar, and I needed to pick my apples in the orchard!   But I wouldn't take back that 45 minutes now.  I still got everything I needed done and a blessing of touching someone else's life.

Don't miss out on the blessings of relationships and people because of tasks.  Task's can usually wait, people matter NOW!

Blessings,
Angela Poch

The Most Important Benefit of Gratitude

I missed posting last week because I was at the 4-Day TEAM CBT Intensive in Whistler with Dr. David Burns.  It was an amazing event, learn more about dealing with anxiety, depression, procrastination, and more at www.FeelingGood.com.  Anyway, I said we'd look at the benefits of gratitude so that's what this week is about.

There are all kinds of blogs, articles, and studies on gratitude.  An article in Forbes lists 7 Scientifically Proven benefits including: Building social relationships, improving physical health, mental wellness,  enhances empathy and reduces aggression, helps with better sleep, improves self-esteem, and lastly improves mental strength. https://www.forbes.com/sites/amymorin/2014/11/23/7-scientifically-proven-benefits-of-gratitude-that-will-motivate-you-to-give-thanks-year-round/#50d3eb92183c

Perhaps that last one is the most important benefit of gratitude, it improves mental strength, or one could say is a powerful coping skill. Don't get me wrong, we all want better relationships with those we love and who doesn't want to have great physical health. But, with our body systems so interconnected having the ability to cope with things life throws at us is one of the keys to not only happiness but also our health.

Counting my blessings has helped me cope with many stressors in my life from moderate irritations to full blown anxiety attacks.  While listing 10 things I'm grateful for didn't cure my intense anxiety, it did help me to calm down long enough to use the appropriate cognitive techniques (several listed in Dr. Burn's podcasts on itunes if you are interested).  When I have had IBS attacks, reciting things I am grateful for makes the time pass so much faster and it lessens the pain significantly.

What are some ways you use gratitude to cope? I'd love to hear from you.

One last thing I wanted to share, is something I am truly grateful for and that is.... drum roll.... people who are willing to agree to disagree.  Over the years, I've met some pretty mean people on the internet.  I'm sure in 'real life' they aren't as bad as online, but there is an awful lot of criticism out there. Whether you are trying to go plant based, just eat a few more veggies, or go all the way vegan it can be disheartening to have your mistakes plastered by others.  One blogger who is as kind hearted as she is determined to help save the planet and the critters on it is Tully Zander. She has some wonderful recipes that you will find absolutely delicious along with blog articles.  Check them out on her website: www.vegansfirst.com

When Crying Feels Good -- 5 Benefits To Tears

I once heard someone say crying is like a celebration of that which you've lost. That was such an amazing revelation to me. That's often exactly how I feel. Like I'm enjoying a piece of history.  Emotions are not as cut and dry as we'd like to think.  Life is fluid why should we expect our emotions to be static as if they are box in neat little packages.  Reality is our lives and our emotions are dynamic and integrated with each other.  We can be happy and cry, sad and laugh, or even bemused and angry, all at the same time.  Embracing this dichotomy is healthy.

Have you ever tried to avoid crying, holding it all back, distracting yourself to keep the tears in, only to feel an immense release once you allowed yourself the freedom to let it all out?   I know I have. In fact, I find from time to time I need a good cry. It's like a cathartic release of stress, grief, anxiety, and in that moment I actually feel good.

Did you know there are benefits to crying.  Here are five:1

• Part of healthy grieving
• Helps with emotional balance
• Restores body balance
• Improves mood
• It can dull pain

Crying is part of a healthy grieving process.  I already mentioned it's like a celebration of what you've lost.  That loss can be a person, job, dream, or even goal.  It can be part of life transitions for example your child who is now all grown up. These can be happy celebrations or real struggles. Granted we don't have to cry to grieve, each person has their own unique ways of dealing with loss, but often tears are a catharsis that is beneficial.

"'Crying activates the body in a healthy way,' says Stephen Sideroff, Ph.D., a clinical psychologist at UCLA and director of the Raoul Wallenberg Institute of Ethics. 'Letting down one's guard and one's defenses and [crying] is a very positive, healthy thing. The same thing happens when you watch a movie and it touches you and you cry... That process of opening into yourself... it's like a lock and key'... Stress 'tightens muscles and heightens tension, so when you cry you release some of that,' Sideroff says. '[Crying] activates the parasympathetic nervous system and restores the body to a state of balance.'"2

Not only can crying work with the parasympathetic nervous system, but it can also trigger endorphins like oxytocin and opioids.  These chemicals produce a reaction in the body to produce a sense of calm and ease pain.1   This ability to dull pain might explain why children or even adults cry when injured.  Here you thought it was just to get sympathy.

So, the next time you feel a dampness around your eyes, don't hold back.  It's not only ok to express yourself, but it's healthy!

Next week we'll look at gratitude and the benefits of being thankful.

Sources:

1. “9 Benefits of Crying.” Healthline, Healthline Media, www.healthline.com/health/benefits-of-crying. 

2. Govender, Serusha. “Is Crying Good for You?” WebMD, WebMD, www.webmd.com/balance/features/is-crying-good-for-you#1.